| PALE
AND RIDICULOUS...
Written
by Dean Kish
Edited by Andrew
Marcus
Cast:
John Travolta (Terl), Barry Pepper, (Jonnie Goodboy
Tyler), Forest Whitaker (Ker), Kim Coates (Carlo), Sabine
Karsenti (Chrissie), Richard Tyson (Robert the Fox)
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Overall
Rating:
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Premise:
In
the year 3000, man is no match for the Psychlos,
a manipulative race of aliens on a quest for global
domination. Led by the seductive and powerful
Terl (Travolta), the Psychlos have taken all natural
resources for themselves and left mankind behind
to rot. It is after humanity has given up the
fight against this alien race that a young man
named Jonnie Tyler (Pepper) decides to leave his
desolate home high in the Rocky Mountains and
take a final, courageous stand.
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Rated
PG-13 for fantasy violence.
Dreadlocked
aliens turn mankind into an endangered species?
Battlefield:
Earth is the film adaptation of the best-selling
science fiction novel of the same name. Written by scientologist
guru Ron L Hubbard, Battlefield: Earth tells
the story of the universe-conquering Psychlos, who are
bent on gathering as much profit for their empire as
possible. Unthreatened by a "man-animal" named Jonnie,
the Psychlos decide to rape the Earth of its last natural
resources. Once completed, the entire human population
will be eliminated. Thus, it’s up to Johnny to free
his people and lead a revolt.
I
guess the best way to describe this film is by comparing
it to other sci-fi classics of the past. The world Johnny
struggles to free is right out of that great classic
cartoon series from the ‘80s called "Thundarr the Barbarian"
or even "Planet of the Apes". The Psychlos are a mixture
of Klingons and Ferengi from Star Trek. The dogfight
scenes are classically ripped off of films like "Independence
Day" and "Godzilla". It seems like each and every element
in this film originated somewhere else. Hubbard may
have come up with the concepts in this movie before
any of these other references were known. However, with
such a saturated sci-fi market, they look like pale
imitations.
As
I watch John Travolta walking around looking like a
Jamaican trapped in a KISS video, it makes me wonder
whether the project was what he envisioned when trying
so hard to get this sci-fi film off the ground. His
character is devilish, but also so over-the-top arrogant
that I wonder if he is supposed to be laughed at throughout
the film. I know I laughed pretty hard. As for other
star, Barry Pepper, he is able to unlock some charisma
in his unoriginal "gung-ho" character. At least we feel
a little sorry for the guy.
Some
of the language and dialogue is so ridiculous that one
could scratch his head in disbelief that it was actually
written in the script. For instance, the Psychlos claim
to have wiped out the human race in 9 minutes but yet
they never think to scout the civilization for raw materials.
How could aliens this dumb reign so supreme? Battlefield:
Earth is one of those sci-fi films where you pray
the novel is better than the film. If this is a classic
story or novel, then no one ever told me the truth.
If this is a must-see for you this summer, then I recommend
waiting for the next sci-fi flick.
(1.5
of 5) So Says the Soothsayer.
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